Checking Out
Welcome to my random musings about the world, on a weekly-to-occasional basis.
Where we are: By the time you read this, we will have been sprung from quarantine, and will hopefully be in Seoul, enjoying a nice long walk, readjusting to shoes, and maybe buying cheese. Some of us are having intrusive cheese thoughts.
Checking Out
I’ve been jotting down a few notes about our time in C̶a̶p̶t̶i̶v̶i̶t̶y̶ quarantine, and I thought I’d share a small sampling of sentences that were actually uttered in Room 229. They mostly made sense at the time.
Salad dressing is dangerous.
What was that?
A car going by.
Oh, I missed it!
I’m gonna name my next baby Tweezers.
If you analogize my feet to the global environment, they’re the same.
What are you thinking about?
Cheese.
What’s for breakfast?
Salad.
Look, we got snacks! I’ll fight you for the Cheetos.
Yay! It’s time to disinfect the garbage.
Stop snoring.
No. Go away.
*manic laughter* Where exactly would you like me to go?
We’re leaving in 72 hours. I need to start packing.
How’s the floor?
105 degrees.
*hahaha*
No really. It’s 105. My slippers are melting.
What are you looking at?
The kettle. I love the kettle.
*squeee* Look! I got a string cheese! I have to eat it right now don’t talk to me!
I put the soup on the floor to warm.
It’s almost time to put out the garbage. How exciting!
What are you looking at?
Dust bunnies.
Why do you keep locking the door? No one’s going to break in here—we’re basically a leper colony.
Who’s going to turn the light off?
I don’t mind; I’ll just use my foot.
Did you wave at the guy across the hall?
Good heavens no—I don’t want to be deported.
So there are only four Oreos in a pack, huh?
Um. There might be five.
What happened to the fifth one?
Um. I ate it.
Spouse, mindlessly eating a fruit cup: Blech! Eww! There’s something wrong with that grape! (It was a tomato, which is definitely not a grape).
Quick! Come look! There’s a person walking by.
Salad. It’s not just for breakfast any more.
Look! You got a vegan meal.
It has shrimp.
What are you doing?
Standing. I am standing.
Where are you going?
The bathroom. There’s literally nowhere else to go.
Where are you going?
Right over there.
Where are you going?
WTF? How would I be going anywhere?
Where are you going?
...
Take care,
Lisa
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